saying goodbye to fall…

how do i know when it is time to let go?
time to live separate. . .
from my friend.
how do i say good-bye?
when it hurts so much. . .
this is my struggle
today.
as i heal more and more. . .
i see that some things
need to be left behind.
if i am to become whole.

i believe that if we listen. . .
God speaks.

many years ago. . .
God said say good-bye to your friend
so she will stop using you as a gauge for her healing
and will experience true healing on her own.
i never did.
is that why. . .
i continue to spiral.
to feel lost in you still.
i am not who i was when we first met.
but do you see the new me?
do i let you?
i say i do not want her in parts of my life. . .
is that true friendship?

i still hear your voice
i still believe if i have my own. . .
thoughts
beliefs
ideas
opinion. . .
that you will say it is not. . .
absolute.
why is only your truth absolute?
you live in black & white. . .
i believe in
shades of grey.
you won’t let go of me
and my mercy holds me captive to you.
because one day. . .
your wall will crumble.
and if i am not there. . .
who will be your safe harbor?
HIM
because i am only human. . .
i love you.
but i must love you enough to say good-bye. . .

© 2007 jenna woods